10.30.12 Love

5 Tips For Dealing With Your Partner Looking At Other Women

5 Tips For Dealing With Your Partner Looking At Other Women

BY Sarah Prout

Men look at other women and it’s perfectly normal. However, many women feel uncomfortable and start fuming (read: steam billowing out of their ears) when they see their lover eye-balling a younger woman wearing a tight dress or bust them looking at the most ridiculously-themed porn. Have you seen some of that stuff? It’s seriously hilarious and I know you know what I’m talking about.

Here are some practical tips for dealing with this situation:

1. See it for what it is.
I think that the base cause of the feelings of discomfort for women when their partners look at other ladies can be insecurity and it’s really a pointless waste of your precious energy. From personal experience I can honestly say there have been times that my blood wanted to boil when I caught my partner mentally undressing a random woman in a restaurant, supermarket or in the post office. But the biological essence of the situation is that it means nothing. Literally nothing. It’s a fleeting surge that happens within the mind of the man and doesn’t mean he’s going to spontaneously sweep the attractive stranger off her feet and run away with her.

2. Jealousy is not very pretty.
Some men are better than others when it comes to taking a sneaky peek at a hottie. I know if I was a man I’d be pretty good at it I think. I’m pretty good at it now when I check out a man I find attractive.

The key point to remember here is that it’s about feeling worthy within yourself and not letting jealously rattle your cage. By comparing yourself to the woman you bust your partner looking at can be really upsetting and damaging to your
self-esteem if you let it.

3. Transform your fear into trust.
Just remember that it’s not an opportunity to question the special nature of your relationship or question your own unique attractiveness. Fear always attracts more fear so make sure that you approach any issues that make you feel
awkward with a sense of calm when you feel it’s necessary to discuss this with your partner.

Essentially, it’s all about empowerment: feeling comfortable in your own skin so it shouldn’t bother you whatsoever if your man checks out other women.

4. Invite your partner to channel the sexual energy towards you.
I opened a discussion to my boyfriend recently about this tpic as he felt slightly uncomfortable expressing to me that he indeed feels attracted to other women. I told him that this falls into the category of his own private conversation with the Universe and I don’t need to know everything. I also told him that the way I intend to view the situation is that I’m the lucky lady that gets to have all of that energy channelled into me (if you catch my drift) in the privacy and sanctity of our relationship.

5. Allow yourself to shine.
I’ve spent way too much of my life not feeling worthy and choosing to get grumpy over stupid, insignificant stuff. But I’m choosing NOW to be the best time ever to celebrate my own sexiness, my own beauty and my own ability to intend that I feel secure in all situations that arise. The key is alignment and moving away from fear based sense of false competition to allow the essence of our glorious expression as women to shine!

Sarah Prout is a bestselling author, co-founder of the Adventures In Manifesting series, entrepreneur, publisher and mumma of 2 little darlings. She reaches over 55,000 followers in over 24 countries around the globe with heartfelt, vibrant and empowering advice about love, business and style. Visit: SarahProut.com.

Sarah Prout is a bestselling author, co-founder of the Adventures In Manifesting series, entrepreneur, publisher and mumma of 2 little darlings. She reaches over 55,000 followers in over 24 countries around the globe with heartfelt, vibrant and empowering advice about love, business and style. See more of Sarah's work on her website.

Comments

  • Tygalily

    I believe that if one’s man can’t keep his eyes off other women, then
    it’s obvious that he’s lost interest. It is what it is. A person can try
    to justify it all they like, but guess what, it’s true, if he was
    interested in you he’d have his attention on you. I also prefer to be
    real and see it for what it is. Trust is very simple. Either you do or
    you don’t. There’s no in-between. Either he’s into you or he’s not. It’s
    that simple. From what I’ve experienced and thoroughly researched, men
    who disrespect their women have porn addiction. Ultimately they end up
    with porn induced PE and Ed.
    What’s the point in having a one-sided
    relationship. We all want something real. We begin to question
    the validity of the whole “love story’ bullshit. Wonder why people are
    depressed and have lost hope? Some hide it with medication believing
    they are crazy. No you’re not crazy. You’re broken. You’re disappointed
    in humanity and have lost your belief in anything real with a human
    being. You’re into him and he’s into her. God that’s so pathetic. So
    insulting.

  • McKinley Evans

    Kinda hard to “shine” or feel very attractive or wanted when your boyfriend is ogling over other women right in front of you which is worse & insulting a completely asinine.
    Not to mention disrespectful.

    Im not going to go through all this self talk & brain washing myself into happiness in order to deal with a boyfriend who cannot control himself and have some courtesy.
    I prefer to call him on his shitty behavior rather than change mine since I’ve done nothing to have go modify my thoughts or behavior.

    I’m tired of people minimizing men’s lack of self vo yrol and respect! They’re not monkeys who know no better, they can learn to piss In a toilet, they can learn to have some respect for the women they claim they love.

  • bruce

    It’s just as bad to look at other dogs, other cars, other houses and yards.

  • rhon cos

    who wrote this article? a man! i am confident. It is disrespectful and rude and shows the character of the man. A man shouldnt have to try and be faithful. He should just be faithful. He should not desire other women. period.

  • Liz

    This is unlikely to happen but maybe men cheat because of your ignorances. You let him drool over hotties. I mean like its not that he’ll go up and just leave you alone (duh) but thats not love. Take a look around. Overpopulated isnt it? Why? May be because men love intercourse too much. Yet most cant understand that. Might as wellnot be in a relationship to prevent reproduction given the amount of people already here.

  • shandyce

    Hi I have also had the same problem with my boyfriend looking at other women while he is shopping with me! I am also concerned about him looking at girls at work and then telling his friends to look at her ! I would like to know if this is normal and if I should be concerned?? Help

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