08.14.12 Wellness

Psychic Damage and Tarot Trash

Psychic Damage and Tarot Trash

BY Alice Grist

First up I need to be clear. I am a tarot lover, I have been reading the cards since I was 13. At first for friends, but now I do so professionally. I love and praise the genuine guidance tarot can offer, they are like an objective best friend. From my perspective Tarot can tell you what you already, deep down, know. A good genuine reading should compliment your intuition about your own life. A healthy reading does not offer answers or prediction so much as it offers clarity and perspective.

I was taught to read tarot by my Dad and Stepmum. They are Wiccans. If you don’t know what a Wiccan is, just think: friendly white witch who loves the earth and worships the goddess. I learned that a good reading should present the options. It should not make outlandish predictions or give a person specific instructions. I read cards with a client’s free will in mind at all times. I view each reading as loving spiritual guidance that empowers the client to do what they feel is correct in their own circumstances. I would never interfere with a life path by issuing directives.

The reason I tell you this is because I’m concerned. Of late I have had several clients come to me because they had been to see a psychic or tarot reader who has left them distraught. They hoped I could redress the balance and tell them the other reader was wrong. I explained to each person that the reader was neither wrong or right in their predictions but more importantly they had deprived the client of power by making specific and ultimately harmful predictions. In this respect they are very wrong.

One Woman came to me having been told by a tarot reader that she would divorce her husband. The silliest thing was that this totally backtracked on what the reader originally told her. At the start the reader had said everything was going to be great, with no major changes. But as the reading commenced this transformed into divorce! It doesn’t take a psychic to see that this is nonsensical. Not only did the reader change her prediction as she got to know her client’s life…. She also told her a definite outcome, in essence taking away all of her client’s choice and personal power. If that client had not then come to see me for some straight talking she may well have allowed that reading to become a self-fulfilling mess. Whether she gets divorced or not is irrelevant, it’s her choice. What matters is how badly she felt about the reading. How sad and low and desperate it made her. No good reading should ever do this.

Another client of mine was told years ago by a psychic that she would never have children. This had preyed on her mind for some time. She let it eat her up inside. My answer to her was simple. I too have been told by a psychic that I wouldn’t have children. Well guess what…. I just gave birth to my first child 8 weeks ago. Go figure!

The scariest thing about this is that the psychics who have made the dodgy predictions are well known, highly recommended types. So whilst their predictions may or may not be correct, the way they have been issued certainly is not. Whilst some psychics are clearly talented and brilliant, for every reading of brilliance there is much, much rubbish too. Yet we endow these folks with such power over our lives. If you leave any psychic reading feeling anything but happy, empowered ad positive I would consider that reading to have failed. Predictions of doom and gloom have no place in the spiritual empowerment that tarot and other readings can provide.

I speak from experience as I too have been the recipient of a crappy, distressing reading, more than once. When writing my first book The High Heeled Guide to Enlightenment I placed myself in the hands of people touting all manner of divination techniques. At least one of those rendered up foul results, leaving me questioning everything in my life. That person was a well reputed psychic. But what she told me broke my heart. And worse, with hindsight I can see she was emphatically wrong. But had I chosen to abide by her words my life would look very different now. Scary stuff.

This has happened to me one time since and again could have destroyed my life as I knew it, had I let it. Perhaps people out there do allow their lives to be guided by such prediction. I know that my clients came to me deeply affected emotionally by such irresponsible divination.

So where does this leave the tarot reader in me? Well It leaves her very wary of ever overstepping my mark. My mark is simply to guide, to give advice, to counsel too sometimes. I see tarot as a form of intuitive therapy, it helps the client move forward. It does not tell her which way to go. I refuse to give clients any kind of answer, because I believe deep down they already know it themselves. Tarot can be a powerful sign post to your own heart and mind, it can help you attune to what you already believe, think and feel. In this respect it is a precious gift.

Tarot or any psychic art should never rob you of the opportunity to make your own choice. That way madness lies. If you are looking for answers or decision making in the bottom of a teacup or amongst a set of cards, you are looking in the wrong place. The answers are always within, always. Cards and crystal balls can reflect back your own soul. They can shine a brilliant light on your muddled mind. But as far as prediction and prophecy goes I advise you to make your own, and to know wholeheartedly that it is only you who ever truly can.

Alice Grist is author of The High Heeled Guide to Enlightenment and award winning The High Heeled Guide to Spiritual Living. Alice's third book due out early 2013 is; Dear Poppyseed, A Soulful Momma’s Journal. Alice is imprint publisher of Soul Rocks Books that publishes soulful and spiritual books for a new modern generation. Alice regularly contributes her soulful writings to a number of publications and online sites including Huffington Post. For more info go to www.alicegrist.co.uk.

Comments

  • Lauren

    I am glad I found this post. I have been feeling very anxious after a recent reading. What was meant to be a lighthearted reading with several girlfriends has left me feeling shaky and wishing I had never gone. The reader had us do a 3 card simple spread. I got the reversed Tower for my present position and the reversed Lovers for my future. She basically painted a picture of doom and gloom for me, that now has me feeling anxious, worried and out of control. I thought I will feel inspired, but instead just feel sad and depressed. I am trying to put it out of my mind, but it is hard. I truly wish I just never would have went…

    • misyange

      Sorry only just seen this post. How are you doing now a few months down the line ?

  • Wendy

    Thank you for this. I had a sketchy reading that enabled me to hang on to a failing toxic relationship with the hopes it would suddenly change because of her prediction, but it never did , and I knew it wouldn’t. Relying on my own intuition was the biggest gift the reading gave me.

  • kaye

    I had a reading once wherr I hot told that I had 2 marriage lines and that I would most likely have too marriages. Not something you like to hear especially when they don’t tell u how to fix the relationship or give aby kind of help. Leaves u feeling depressed and think whsts the point of getting married if im going to get divorced:/

  • Daniela Ibarra

    Thank you. I have spent the last 9 months feeling lost, anxious and out of control due to a reading. It has definetely caused me a lot of harm. But I know that believing in myself and in God will help me through this.

  • anon

    To anyone stumbling across websites and wondering if their Tarot or Psychic Reading has control over them, DONT GIVE IN. Take it for what it is, but regardless of it being good or bad, the outcome is what you create due to free will. The future isnt set in stone, it’s more like pencil. I believe we all have a destiny/ a fate/ a purpose, but I also believe we are able to get what we want by doing certain actions towards that goal, vice versa. If I asked a deck of cards should I brush my teeth in the morning and it tells me no/ 10 of Swords…guess who is still going to brush her teeth lol. The cards once told me my Great Aunt & Uncle didn’t have any love for each other. funny thing is their love and their story of love is what has made me believe in true partnership for so long, my great aunt died only months later at 87 after my great uncle passed at 96, they got married when she was 18. Not denying the gift of those who are able to read, but hoping the client can understand your mind is more powerful than anything, hence Law Of Attraction. Often times we are wrong, and sometimes we do have to hear or see things we don’t want to, but don’t abandon your own power to believe in a change. Miracles are real. And what you project out into the world is what you will eventually receive. Otherwise we’d all be robots listening to others and ignoring the true power that lies with in. Don’t loose faith.

  • Sam

    I agree in part (everything but the readings should always be positive stuff). I think the issue is with how people use a reading and whether it is used for “fortune telling” (which takes a persons power away) or self-growth. I often find the new-age movement encourages people to become more entitled, borderline, and they can easily lose touch with reality in some situations. Everything has to be positive and nothing negative. Everyone has to be reassured and babied to the point they can’t cope with reality. It is very unhealthy and encourages splitting (borderline behavior where everything is divided into all or nothing, black or white, positive or negative). I actually get really upset with the sugar coating psychics. By the time these individuals get to me for a reading, there is no reasoning with them to let someone who hasn’t called them in 10 months go. They are convinced this person is their “twin flame” who they are “picking up” their thoughts and feelings. They will list off 10 different psychics who encouraged them to hang on. All I can think is there is this shell of a person, completely giving their power away, seeking my guidance which is hard to give if people are afraid of hearing something they don’t like.

    You also have to remember that psychics read from the energy of where you are in the moment which can change. I will tell my clients to realize that even getting a reading can change the outcome. The person who divorce was read, it could have been a real reality for her in that moment. Maybe they were being overly clingy, desperate, and needed to back off a bit and being told divorce would happen triggered them to let go a little enough that it corrected the pattern. Some people seriously believe that if an Al-mighty psychic tells them a job is coming they don’t have to do anything and it will just magically fall on their head. I tell people I read from the moment and the planned action that will be taken. If that action changes, or a reading causes the action to change, then the outcome can change as well. There are tarot spreads you can do to read multiple outcomes. One outcome in general, one if this action is taken, one if this other action is. Even Native Amercian Prophecy works that way. Man will destroy himself if he continues down a materialistic path or a new spiritual revolution will occur which will bring people together to create a new world of peace and harmony.

    People have to take responsibility when seeing a psychic for the questions they ask and why they are seeing someone and not “split.” Splitting occurs when people go into all or nothing thinking or place people on or off a pedestal. Psychics are human and no psychic gift is perfect (same with any other job or quality) and splitting and going to a psychic expecting perfection is part of the problem that creates psychic addiction and other issues. Expecting psychics to be Gods, never erring, and not human with human emotions or flaws is not healthy either. Expecting psychics to always be positive is unrealistic too. Different psychics have different styles. I always loved the blunt ones (even if they made me cry) rather than the fluffy ones because those ones triggered bigger changes in me and for me to change aspects of my life. The biggest problem with psychics is how they are being used (to obsess, be compulsive, to avoid reality, to stay in an abusive situation, to grow, to learn, to empathize, etc.). If a seeker is manipulative or seeking to manipulate a situation or not let go or to stalk or other things, they will likely tend to favor the psychics who encourage that energy.

    Most of all, as you suggest at the end, just remember to own your own power.

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